The day before Sadie was born in February, we visited Caleb's grave. At that point in time, Sadie and Caleb were together in heaven, looking down at their earthly family. I didn't know Sadie would be coming early the next morning, but looking back, I would like to think that Caleb sent Sadie to us after visiting his graveside that cool Sunday and that that was the last thing we needed to do as a family before Sadie came to us.
On Memorial Day we again visited Caleb's graveside. This was the first time we have celebrated Memorial Day in Utah. This time, Sadie was with us. I couldn't help but think of the tender mercies that Heavenly Father has given to me and my family. For allowing us those beautiful 3 months, 3 weeks with our sweet Caleb, and then for sending us our little Sadie, who has helped us again to reflect upon and appreciate those early weeks with Caleb. How grateful I am for my children, for Maggie and Sam who were born first so that they could have each other, for Caleb who came and stayed for awhile even though it was hard, and for Sadie who has brought the sweetness of heaven with her, another tender mercy of a loving Heavenly Father. How grateful I am for the knowledge and reality of eternal families.
Over the past few weeks, I've been reminded of some things about Caleb that I have forgotten with the passing of time. My perspective was enlightened and some of the difficulty I've had at visiting his graveside in terms of the memories of his death and passing have been swallowed up in the firm and lasting hope that our Savior offers us.
so beautiful
ReplyDeleteCharity, you've been on my mind a lot lately. In the short week we spent at UCSF with our little Hugh, I couldn't help but think of you and the long weeks you spent there with Caleb and all the emotions that that must have brought with them. One week was almost more than I could handle. I can't even imagine the patience and faith you had to have to get through that period. You are an amazing person and I feel so blessed by your example and faith. I'm so glad that you've continued to be blessed with healing and understanding.
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